Driving

When boredom kicked in a few hours ago it has just lead my down the same path with those thoughts, and feeling over crappiness. I wasn't able to keep myself busy, with games wearing thin, music non-existent, hardly able to study, and nothing to read. I just sit here staring at this screen. Feels pretty melancholic right now. Mmmm nothing like a cruise at night, haven't gone out for one in a while, so I'll go do that now..

1 hour 10mins later. I went by St Peters and St James at first just to check it out. Went to the city on the Princes Hwy, then back to suburbia on the Nepean Hwy. umm yeh i don't remember much else to write coz that was last night. But it sure felt good, feeling free, like I'm in control. When I'm not driving, I'm just back in my cage..

for today - wednesday 14/06/2010

Just another day at work. I decided to write a list of things I need to improve on personally:

To stop giving up when doing tasks

To bear through things that I don't want to do

To be less socially awkward

To be less quiet

To stop thinking that what I show on the outside isn't what I feel inside. I do feel happy at times.

Things to do:

Delete her from MSN. Its just no good, a lost cause. She doesn't even remember you. All I see is her bragging about her boyfriend. How he is so perfect, that he's everything she needs, and that not one can replace him. Don't know when I'll do it..

I am missing a close friend, a best friend. I tried to find it in her again, but its just a ghost of the past. The last two months since unblocking her, I've barely spoke to her. I just don't even know what to say. I can't even joke around with her. Everything is just dead.

I am not empty inside, but it feels that way.